OPPAI ORACLE

CyTube officially open! Will be in there off and on afk-ing until 18:00 UTC (2 hours from now) if anyone wants to stop in and chill.

2026/06/20 CYTUBE: IN RETROSPECT

This was an AMAZING CyTube. Attendance was VERY consistent without and maxxed out at about 19! That's almost on the level of Heyuri's streams! Of course, it was all thanks to the cooperation of everyone choosing to take the time out of their day to join me and I am deeply thankful for it. So let's talk a bit about what happened:



Život není krásný aka Life Is Not Beautiful (2008)
Jehovova pomsta aka Jehovah's Revenge (2010)

These two were prepared and recommended by forum user drummyfish. They were quite off-the-wall and definitely a particularly Czech kind of comedy, but they were a big hit even for non-Czechs. I was among them. They are fucking nuts!! They have amateur porno-tier low budgets and basically tell the story of a bunch of assholes acting stupid, but you have to see the crazy, offensive shit that happens in them. Someone compared them to Postal and that gives you an idea. The second one was especially hilarious in my opinion. The subtitles were generated by an AI so there were some technical difficulties as we had to switch to a file without some fucked up issues that happened with the subs, but thankfully everyone was patient and things worked out well in the end. I was happy to have a suggestion that I was watching for the first time as well, as much as I love sharing some of my old favorites that I don't get a chance to that often.



The Rapeman (1994)

This OVA was at the top of the polls for a long time and finally we got around to it. It's as stupid and offensive as the name suggests: a vigilante superhero who enacts justice through the power of rape! What's the only way you can make that better? Some of the most INSANE fansubs I've ever seen. I'm not the kind of guy to say "they don't make 'em like this anymore" very often, but when it comes to fansubs? These guys just went nuts and had a blast. It was clearly made by some 4channers and it shows, you have them translating things like deactivating a laser detector as "I have to turn off the LAZOR CHARGIN station." saint actually tracked down the .srt on a site and was able to put a date to it: 2007-01-26. That sounds about right. Everyone loved this and I was happy to see them enjoy the glory of THA FUKKEN RAPEMAN:







Dark Cat (1991)

By this point, two of our friends from associate forum Deluoode (who have accounts here too of course) joined, Maypews and capstasher. cap was there for The Rapeman but May was nice enough to show up for this one. I gave people a few choices to vote for as an extra encore OVA that were relatively short and easy to watch and this one won. We watched it with the English dub, which I was slightly afraid I was overhyping as the worst "real" dub I'd ever heard. I was glad to see I was mistaken and this dub is still OTHERWORLDLY. Main girl sounds like a drunk mom from LA. The main male love interest speaks in a hilarious monotone the whole time. He sounds like an actual downsie. He spends most of the movie being depressed alone in his room because he won't find love. But the chud blossoms into a hero at the end. Along with vocoder effects that make the main villain's dialogue about 50% incoherent and weird segments of tree spirits and the ugliest fucking cats I've ever seen in anime (how do you fuck up cute cats in anime?).

THE NEXT CYTUBE:

The most likely date for the next one will be July 18th. I'm moving the week after that, so it's possible that I may have my desktop PC packed up by then, but I can host it on my laptop if needed, probably. If it's a real problem, I will reschedule. This also happens to be my birthday so I'm going to give myself a privilege and choose one OVA of my own that might not necessarily win the poll. It will be one with sentimental meaning to me. Movie and so on will be determined with a StrawPoll as usual. Now that I have a StrawPoll account I'm going to replace the temporary polls I've been doing with two permanent ones that I can consistently update/edit. I'm going to remove the descriptions of the entries in the poll proper so go ahead and check them in the OP to know what you're voting for, if you need to. Of course, I'm happy for suggestions as well.

Thanks for being awesome and stopping by!
And don't forget to vote for what anime and movie you want to watch next! (pick as many as you want)

I also want to give a shoutout to allied forum Deluoode, who hosts something like this but on an even more consistent basis (every Sunday). If you like watching here, you should give them some love and join there too. Join the forum if you haven't, in fact. I wish I could join theirs tomorrow but I'm a normie loser with real life friends who has IRL plans.
DELUOODE ANIME CLUB INFORMATION

I decided to try to even out the number of entries for anime and for movies and so I added 15 movies to round each out to 30. I'm not sure if I want to enforce a hard limit, but maybe something like 45 is a good enough pool for people to choose from, though I'd still love suggestions of course! I will bump some of mine off if I need to. Anyway, here's what I added:

• Didn't You Hear? (1970) (92 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  Very obscure film which is kind of magical because of its hidden, forgotten nature. The story revolves around a bored and alienated college student who is unable to enjoy his ordinary life. Instead, he escapes into fantasy worlds of him and his friends as pirates sailing around and visiting exotic islands. Fun fact: This was the first film to ever have a soundtrack made with a Moog synthesizer.
• If Footmen Tire You, What Will Horses Do? (1971) (52 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  A lot of old religious scare films are hilariously cheesy, but none of them compare to this, which is just BATSHIT INSANE. It's based on the teachings of some preacher who warns his congregation that communist infiltrators will soon take over America and attempt to brainwash all Christians into atheism, if not kill them outright. Amazing acted segments where evil Rooskie agents kill people and brainwash children and interrogate families. The ineptitude is off the wall and the content is crazy unhinged. Honestly more violent and scary than many drive-in films from the time.
• White Rose Campus: And Then Everyone Gets Raped (1982) (66 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  The best title of any movie ever! What's there to say besides the name? Have you ever seen one of those anime episodes where they're going on a class trip? Imagine if instead of getting to their destination, the bus was hijacked by crazy rapists and everyone was fucked in excruciating ways. Nice cinematography like all these Nikkatsu pink films.
• The Dark Side of Midnight (1984) (89 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  Horrible and ultra-cheap slasher movie about a town terrorized by a homicidal maniac called THE CREEPER! Stars a badass detective who has to track him down named BROCK JOHNSON, which is the most badass name! The funny thing is that Brock Johnson is played by Wes Olsen, the director and writer. And he's not what you might think: He's a dumpy middle aged guy with reddish hair and a beer gut. And yet at multiple times characters say he looks really young for his age, lol. Pretty hilarious.
• Pulgasari (1985) (95 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  A case where the story behind the movie is even more interesting than the film itself. Read about it on Wikipedia for full background, but this film was made in North Korea and is a clear rip-off of the Godzilla/kaijuu craze. The funniest part? It was made by a KIDNAPPED SOUTH KOREAN DIRECTOR. If you've ever wanted to watch a film from Best Korea, this is probably the most famous and best made one you're going to find. Of course, teh monster is a symbol for capitalism!!!
• The Abomination (1986) (89 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  An amazing slice of "backyard filmmaking" from the 80s (shot on glorious Super-8!). It's filmed and set in some remote Texas town and is a weird, stupid story about some guy whose mom is addicted to some phony televangelist. She coughs up a tumor that comes to life. From there, it turns into a bunch of awesome gore. To quote the endorsement of a VHS collector on YouTube I used to watch circa like 2008 who turned me onto it: "a lot of stuff vomits in this movie and it's funny."
• Venus Flytrap (1987) (64 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  Shot-on-video horror shocker from the 80s and perfectly emblematic of the stupid, crude, and often bizarre nature of these films. This one stars some street punks, including the amazing character Turk (he's not a Turk btw, I think they just wanted a name that sounded like a meathead). He utters lines of pure mastery like "isn't darts kind of a fag game?" Eventually they crash a party at some yuppie house and soon people start being murdered in gruesome ways. The ending is kind of mind-blowing.
• Nukie (1987) (99 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  One of those films which is often called the worst movie ever made. Infamous on Something Awful back in the day. A ripoff of E.T. starring the ugliest and shittiest-looking alien puppet ever made (literally shitty-looking, looks like a turd), which speaks in an unbelievably grating and annoying voice. This is to Mac and Me what Mac and Me is to E.T.. I showed this to friends in high school and they were made at me for like a week. It's how I show my friends I love them!
• Nekromantik (1988) (75 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  Fucking over-the-top and crazy movie for hardcore dudes. It's about a couple of necrophiliacs and their adventures. When the main character loses access to corpses, he spirals down a trail of insanity which results in one of the craziest end scenes ever. Amazing practical effects and awesome low-budget Super-8 cinematography. Was banned in many countries for its offensive content. Some say there's symbolic critiques of the German conservative class in it. Also the main actor in this, Daktari Lorenz, went on to be an erotic photographer. If you're a maniac for mega-sized tits like me and have fapped to Nadine Jansen or Milena Velba, you're probably enjoying his cinematography!
• The Carrier (1988) (99 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  REALLY weird movie from the 1980s. I guess I would call it a horror film, but it's hard to really place into a genre. It's about a teenage guy who contracts a mysterious disease from some supernatural force. The result of the disease is the nightmare version of the Midas touch: everything he touches becomes a deadly item that fuses into others when they touch it. Only the MC is immune to it, but he has to keep it a secret. A really strange indie film with some hairy parts, but the kind you love to find.
• Small White House (1990) (90 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  One of the weirdest little oddities I've ever come across on torrent trackers. This thing was released on an out-of-print VHS and never seems to have reappeared. I don't know much about the film's background at all because it's hard to find any info. But the film itself is one of a kind. It's APPARENTLY somehow an exploration of the love triangle between JFK, Jackie O, and Marilyn Monroe. But it devolves into a series of strange, feverish set pieces that are hard to really make sense of. Frankly, I don't know what the fuck happened in it. But there's something about it that is weirdly quite beautiful too. Think Antonioni with a lot more transsexual hookers and body fluids.
• Even Hitler Had a Girlfriend (1992) (98 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  I like the IMDb description for this one: "This is the story of Marcus Templeton, a lonely security guard who blows all of his life savings on prostitutes because he is a TOTAL LOSER!" It's accurate. This is a strange dark comedy (?) of sorts about a fat schlub who blows all his money on hookers and basically decides to go down a hedonism spiral. It's like people wanted to make the biggest loser character possible. If you want to watch a comedy with the atmosphere of the Ricardo Lopez suicide tapes, pick this.
• Prehysteria! 3 (1995) (84 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  The first Prehysteria! movie is a very bad kids' movie about a family that discovers dinosaur eggs that hatch into miniature, toy-size dinosaurs who they then keep as pets. It's pretty silly and has terrible effects, but isn't the most special. Nor is the second film. The third though? The pure ineptitude makes you drop your jaw in every scene. You have not seen terrible practical effects until you've seen this film. The funniest part is that the dinosaurs are BARELY EVEN IN THIS FILM because the plot has FUCKING NOTHING to do with the previous two, and yet you still will somehow never be bored because your brain will be melting at the sheer stupidity.
• Freeway 2: Confessions of a Trickbaby (1999) (97 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  One of the craziest movies I've ever seen. It's about a bulimic teen prostitute who escapes juvenile prison with a serial killer who acts super cartoonishly "crazy" and the two run away to Mexico where the plot gets bugfuck insane. It's some of the most tasteless and twisted humor along the way and the whole thing feels very unhinged. You're not sure if you're supposed to be laughing or deeply invested in the drama. It exploits everything over-the-top and jerks between high melodrama and straight up cartoon shit. High octane trash that will make you feel like no other movie.
• Despiser (2003) (105 min.) - 0 votes
  Spoiler

  Do you like bad CGI? Imagine a movie where like half the visuals are some of the most hideous CGI you've ever seen in a movie, to the point where it almost becomes a surreal masterpiece of bizarre visuals because of it. That's this movie. The story is some half-baked nonsense about a guy going into purgatory to rescue his wife from demons that could have come from the cinematics in the first StarCraft game. Add to that some of the worst dialogue ever and you have a classic.

I've been thinking about suggestions but I have to sort them out a little. There are 3 more yet unsuggested ZNK movies, although 2 aren't that good; the other one is okay (Máma má raka), around 40 minutes I think, but I'd have to make subtitles again (this time with more effort, I promise ). Besides this I have a lot personal favorites such as Les Visiteurs, but they're less obscure and of normal length, so I'm hesitant to suggest at the moment considering the style that's been set so far. So I have to sift through those favorites and pick the ones I would consider best for the whole audience here.

JULY 18TH CYTUBE HAS BEEN DECIDED

As you may have guessed from the giant countdown at the top of the forum, CyTube has been decided. I apologize for not being able to dismiss this one, but I couldn't figure out how to have the countdown without it embedded in the html itself. The times are in UTC, which should work out to the event starting in early-late afternoon for those in the Americas and early-late evening for those in Europe. Please adjust for your own timezone as needed though.

I NOW HAVE A NICONICODOUGA-STYLE PLUGIN FOR MY CYTUBE WHICH WILL HAVE CHAT MESSAGES SCROLL ACROSS THE SCREEN IN CLASSIC NICONICODOUGA STYLE, WHICH MAKES CHAT GOING CRAZY EXTRA FUN

A few reminders as always:

• You can come for only part of the stream if, by chance, you only want to watch the movie or only want to watch one OVA or the other. That's why I try to schedule things in advance, though there might be a bit of wiggle room around these starting times due to technical difficulties.
• I am always open to suggestions in this thread. But please make it formal and help me by writing an enticing description like mine. Thanks to drummyfish and Deoster for already doing this.
• Don't feel pressured to contribute in chat if you'd prefer to be a passive viewer. But please don't feel embarrassed to make jokes and comments. We don't bite! And these events are always more fun when chat is rowdier.

Anyway, this is the expected plan of action:



18:00 UTC: Mind Trap (1989) (90 min.)

I have an obsession with cheesy B-grade action movies from the 80s made by low-budget studios. Trust me when I say that this is near the best of them if you value what I do in these movies: Stories that are so poorly executed, acted, and conceived that you feel like you're having a stroke the whole time. I have absolutely no idea what happens in this movie, but it has something to do with an actress, Russian spies, and a machine that creates dreams. Truly bonkers and hilarious in its ineptitude.

This was the top rated film on the poll after Na plech, the next film in the amazing ZNK trilogy of low-budget, offensive Czech films recommended by drummyfish. We will get around to that one soon for sure, but I wanted to mix things up a bit.



20:00 UTC: Jungle de Ikou! (1997) (3 episodes, each 30 minutes)

Deluoode cross-posters may want to duck out during this one as we watched it on Deluoode not too long ago. But if you're like me, you'll just be excited to watch it all over again! This was the highest-rated anime entry on the polls and it's a true masterpiece of insane, stupid, over-the-top 90s OVA nonsense. It's something of an inside joke among my IRL friends because of how much one friend hated it to no end. So I keep pushing it on him because I think it's some of the best shit I've ever seen! Watch it if you like fan service, off-the-wall humor, and tribal oonga boonga sechz.


Pictured: Character who is canonically 11 years old.

22:00 UTC: Eiken: Eiken-bu yori Ai wo Komete (2003-2004) (2 episodes, each 30 minutes)

AKA, the series that single-handedly raised the bar for what an "acceptable" level of largeness was for anime breasts. Divided the western anime community into those who had no sense of humor and joy and those who saw the light (and required therapy for the rest of our lives based on the Pandora's box of fetishes it unlocked). Take a shot during every panty shot and boob jiggle and you'll die in five minutes (NOT EXAGGERATING, I don't think there are many frames in this that don't have one or the other). Not as high in the rankings as some, but this CyTube will be hosted on my birthday so fuck it, I'm giving myself a freebie and want to share this with everyone as a bonding exercise. You'll probably think it's shit and I'll call you all gay, like good friends do.



I hope mentioning that this is on my birthday doesn't come across as attention-baiting. I do it more so to say that I'm deeply thankful for everyone who joins these and that I can think of no better way to spend the day that means most to me.

By the way, I considered that if I'm going to keep one running poll of what to watch next, it's probably best to let people vote each time and revise their votes after a CyTube rather than locking it to one vote per IP address. So I decided to edit the polls to make it one vote per browser session rather than one vote per IP address:

VOTE ON WHAT ANIME TO WATCH NEXT HERE (Choose as many as you want)

VOTE ON WHAT MOVIE TO WATCH NEXT HERE (Choose as many as you want)

Descriptions are in the OP of this thread, of course.

We're not large enough to worry about voting security, so do what you will if you really have the patience to repeatedly close your browser and vote over and over again. Hopefully for now this will inspire others to vote more at least, lmao.

I've done this for my other polls as well:

What game should I play next? (1cc)
What game should I play next? (non-1cc)
What visual novel should I read next?
What book should I read next?
What manga should I read next?
What anime/drama should I watch next?

2026/07/18 CYTUBE: IN RETROSPECT

The CyTubes keep getting better and better! We reached a new record of 22! Some random guy came in and called us pedos and then immediately left (which is hilarious because it was during a show with girls with nothing but huge tits)... so I'll see if I need to get back to using a password to protect the stream from random retards coming in as we get high up on the CyTube rankings. But that's just a sign of how much fun this was. It was my birthday and I couldn't have asked for a better time than watching old favorites. It means even more that so many chose to do this instead of watching England vs. France (though many had eyes on it in the tenser moments!)



Mind Trap (1989)

Mind-melting 80s action movie which was a ton of fun. It wasn't much more comprehensible this time, but the story is indeed basically that two sisters are chased down by Rooskie agents who want to capture a "dream room" that their father owns. The main villain has one of the worst fake Russian accents ever. It's like she just randomly puts "y" sounds into her vowels and says stuff like NYEVER and YEEDIOTS. The main girl looks like Grimes. One scene has a guy doing Vanilla Ice dance moves in the back for some reason. The sound mixing is all over the fucking place.

Spoiler

Jungle de Ikou! (1997)

The highest-voted anime choice is an all-time classic that I loved as a kid (and awakened something dark within me...). Everyone enjoyed it a lot. Water spirit Rongo got much more love than she ever gets since she is overshadowed by Mii's amazing symbols of earthen fertility and maternal warmth. All Japanese really are mothercons at heart...

Spoiler

Eiken: Eiken-bu yori Ai wo Komete (2003-2004)

A show that gives me genuine sentimental feelings, as silly as it sounds. This is one that apparently a few others knew about but I don't know if anyone else had seen it before. I'm glad everyone could see this and understand why I got so fucked in the head early on. It's just way too much, and that's what's great about it. Luckily most people seemed to enjoy it and even find it genuinely funny in how far it goes for the sake of ridiculous fan service. I forgot how insane the overabundance of phallic objects and suspicious fluids are in it.

Spoiler

BINGO?

Close, but no cigar...

Spoiler

EDIT: Zil got a bingo. Congrats!

THE NEXT CYTUBE:

I've set a tentative date of August 29th. I might push it back a bit depending on how busy I am. We will most likely watch Na plech aka Do the Mæth as a movie as it is leading the polls. It is the final piece of the amazing Czech ZNK series and I am really looking forward to seeing the end of it, as I imagine many others are. But if something else tops the polls before then, we'll do that instead. So get votes in! This poll is now designed to be available every browser session so it stays fresh and I can keep updating it, so vote again if you already have. I might also add a few more choices. Tell me what you want to watch next here:
VOTE ON WHAT ANIME TO WATCH NEXT HERE (Choose as many as you want)
VOTE ON WHAT MOVIE TO WATCH NEXT HERE (Choose as many as you want)
(Check the OP for descriptions)

I also want to give a shoutout to allied forum Deluoode, who hosts something like this but on an even more consistent basis (every Sunday... though tomorrow is an exception). If you like watching here, you should give them some love and join there too. Join the forum if you haven't, in fact.
DELUOODE ANIME CLUB INFORMATION

NEXT CYTUBE VIEWING HAS BEEN DECIDED!

August 29th:

18:00 UTC:
Na plech aka Do the Mæth (2015) (99 min.) - 4 votes (+6=10)

Spoiler

After the immense success of the ZNK series that started as purely amateur films, the sixth installment is now a professionally made movie, which however by some miracle didn't take away from its dark and "offensive" style of humor. In fact fans now praise it as a savior of the now famous, controversial but slightly declining Czech "franchise". The film follows a young, ambitious business graduate full of hopes for a corporate career until he's confronted with the real world... and gets to know the Grunza family, a gypsy clan known in the underground as the best meth producers in the business. - drummyfish

Final film in the ZNK trilogy that we watched the first two of some time ago and were a big hit. I'm excited to see some more of this crazy stuff!

Dragon Half (1993) (2 episodes) - 2 votes (+3=5)

Spoiler

Charming little OVA starring a very cute human-dragon hybrid (read: girl with wings and a tail). She sets off on a quest to become fully human. Full of silly gags and sketches. References old RPGs from the golden age.

Very charming OVA full of chibi/deforume characters 90% of the time. Some of the gifs from it in this flash haunted me for years until I finally made the effort to find it. Another one of those childhood series for me.

We might watch a second OVA after Dragon Half depending on my availability and others'. I'll put one of the higher-voted OVAs up for a vote the day of.

HOWEVER, the truth is that Dragon Half was not technically the most highly-voted anime. It was Mouse, but that one is about 2 hours in full, so it would be better to watch it on its own. But this gives me a question that I want you all to answer: What should I do with longer anime series that would be better to marathon together like this? I see a few options:

1. We could watch one or two episodes at a time. Deluoode's Otaku Oratory does this, but they also meet once a week, so they can actually finish them in a reasonable time frame. If I host these once a month or so, it's inconceivable. I prefer doing these on a monthly basis as it tends to make them more "special" and makes people more likely to show up. (Heyuri has proven this.) But maybe one "longer-running" series could have an episode or two every week and a larger series/movie once a month?

2. We could watch the whole series at once. For your average 12-13 episode series, this is a marathon but it's not the hardest thing to do. Heyuri does it, and it's reasonable for a "rare" once-a-month thing. That means we would just decide when to do it. I see a few viable options:
1) Just alternate between full-series and movie-and-OVA parties and keep them once a month. I could alternate them intentionally every other CyTube, or I could just go by whatever has the most votes (my slight preference).
2) If the most-voted is a full series, set the NEXT week to be a movie-and-OVA party as "compensation" or bonus. So there would be two a month rather than one (maybe pushing off to the week after next if it overlaps with Heyuri). Also a good option for a show that is 26 episodes or so (2 seasons). The very next day would be a bit soon but is a potential option.

What do you all think? Which of these options sound appealing? I definitely look forward to watching Mouse in any case. It's probably the show that is most sentimental fap material to me after Eiken.

For anyone interested in these CyTubes: Tomorrow Heyuri is watching Mahou Shoujo Neko Taruto at 18:00 UTC (the same time I do my CyTubes)

Thread with more info.

I need to make a notice for those who aren't familiar with Heyuri: It has stricter rules than my CyTubes. Nothing gay like "no loli jokes" (in fact you should DEFINITELY not join if you are easily offended by pedo jokes lmao), but they don't allow most modern internet slang. Consult their rules here: https://wiki.heyuri.net/index.php?title=Rule_8
It makes it a nicer space, honestly. But just be aware of that if you join. I will be there and it would be nice to see you!

Also, don't forget that MY CyTube will be one week from that on the 29th!

I've been a bit quiet this week due to IRL duties. Luckily I have a big break coming up. But yes, though I haven't been shilling it as heavily, there will be a CyTube tomorrow! I hope to see everyone there. I'll advertise it on Heyuri too so maybe a few Heyurizens will stop by.

Keep being awesome! I'm looking forward to it.